I've been doing a lot of thinking about this whole blogging thing. Do I talk about my past? My relationship? My lunch choices for the week...
Well, I think I'm going to take it one day at at time. See what inspiration the world and those in it provides me. See the movement of the world, and where my place is in it.. for the moment anyway.
The result? Perhaps something kinda cool. Perhaps I'll stumble on some homeopathic cure for insomnia.. maybe a combination.. :)
But, today the song from Rent is on my mind.
"Take me as I am.. who I was meant to be.. and if you give a damn.. take me baby or leave me."
How many people can we think of in our live that we'd love to sing this too? Maybe we wish for some sort of real life soundtrack to follow us around, and in those moments that people just make us stand there and be shocked at the stupidity of the world, this song would come on.. Dancers would come out of the bushes and store fronts and start dancing around us.. and maybe, just maybe they'd get it.
It never ceases to amaze me at how mean people can be. How truly rude and self serving they can be. How two faced they can be. and all the while play the victim.
For example, there is this person in my life.. (and I use the word IN in the very minimalistic terms) At one time she was very important to me.. but our views on life, sanity and how to be a normal person were very different. So, this happens.. you meet someone and think they are one way, and after a period of time you learn that you were wrong, and you have to rethink the dynamic of the relationship.
Here's the conundrum...
Can you ever go back? Can you just be friends? Be acquaintances?
I had always thought you could.. but I am slowly beginning to think that is as much as a fairy tale as the ones that start Once Upon a Time...
Then these people just seem to enjoy making your life miserable.. they enjoy wallowing in the drama.. they enjoy proving over and over that your thoughts and opinions of them were spot on.
Maybe I am just venting tonight.. and that could very well be. but, my question to you all is this.. If there was a good relationship at one time.. can't you let that be the final memory.. instead of ruining it with garbage and mistrust?
We don't have to agree. You don't have to like what I do and how I do it. But, those words ring true...
Take me as I am or leave me.
i think that, sometimes, even if you can go back....there is just no more point.
ReplyDeleteWe evolve, grow, become someone stronger....and people around us do not always make the same choices. We do what we know how to do.
It would be *nice* if we could go back and visit with who we were with people who knew us then....but it just is not always possible.
i hope that you make this a place as wonderful and dynamic as you are....and fill the pages with whatever feels right to you. :)
Hi Jade,
DeleteI do agree with you, that sometimes it's not only better but more healthy to just move on and not look back. We do evolve an grow, when others are content on staying where they are.
But, sometimes I think that looking back and trying to understand what changed and how it changed is more of a benefit to us. It's about our growth, our changes and our needs. It can help us understand where we came from and where we are heading too.. and the changes that come along with it.
<3
Amaia